The parable of the scorpion and the frog which I share below is an important one. It is important for our own sense of well being to surround ourselves with healthy supportive people, but what if we don’t. This blog will help you identify if you have interacted with toxic people and the challenges you may face. What are toxic people? In short, When you have interacted with a toxic person you may feel: like there is a new crisis or drama, irritated, energetically, emotionally and or physically drained, depressed, anxious, nervous, angry, frustrated, underappreciated, invalidated, blamed, shamed, guilt-ed, and made to feel less then. If you feel any or all of these things after an encounter with a toxic person then welcome to the club of people who have been slimed by toxic people. You start thinking negative and disempowering thoughts about yourself and or others or you may just feel like you are going crazy.
If you want peace, calm and a sense of control in your life then do not engage with toxic people otherwise you may be poisoned like this parable of the Scorpion and the Frog below. I use this parable with some of my clients when they are dealing with someone who is toxic (scorpion). Some of my clients keep engaging with toxic poeple thinking they will get different results. When they do not get different results they feel hurt and do not understand why. The following parable may help you understand why.
One day there was a frog by the side of a pond relaxing. A scorpion climbs up on a rock not to far from the frog. “Hello frog I need your help. Can you please carry me over to the other side of the pond? I cannot swim and it is very important that I get there quickly.” The frog looks over and says “No, you are a scorpion and scorpions kill frogs. If I do that you will sting my and kill me”. The Scorpion looked sympathetically to the frog and said “frog that does not make any sense. If I sting you then I would drawn as well. I can not swim. That is why I need your help. You would not be a good frog at all if you do not help your fellow friends. I give you my word. I will not sting you.” The frog thought about this. He did not like this but thought the scorpion did give his word and he would be a bad frog if he did not help this fellow. The frog thought that if he was in need he would want someone to help him. The frog turned to the scorpion and said “Ok I will carry you across the pond but only if you promise you will not sting me.” The scorpion agreed. The scorpion crawled on the frogs back and halfway across the pond the scorpion stings the frog with a deadly blow. Just before the frog goes under the water the frog ask’s but why did you sting me? You can not swim. We will both die.” The scorpion said “because I am a scorpion and that is what I do. It is in my nature.”
Save yourself from people (scorpions) like this. How? you may ask, by letting peoples actions speak louder then their words. For example if someone asks for a financial loan and they have never paid you or anyone else you know back but say they will this time. Think “scorpion” or give them the money without any expectations that you will see it again.
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